EAP Saved My Life.

This testimony is a true story, as submitted by an anonymous state of Indiana employee.

*Trigger warning: The following contains open discussion of suicide and the use of a firearm.

Imagine waking up hopeless. Not just today, every day. As long a life as you’ve already lived, I imagine at some point you shared my experience.

Imagine your family a lives in another state. Imagine feeling purposeless at work and directionless at home alone. Where do you turn?

Many days I wanted to drive myself into a tree off SR 67—I knew which curve would be ideal. Several days I considered putting a gun to my head.

I wanted to get help, but I could barely afford rent. I definitely couldn’t afford to see a psychiatrist.

At the time, I’d never heard of the Employee Assistance Program. I didn’t know help was available.

One particularly hopeless day, my boss wrote a number down on the back of her business card and told me to call.

On my lunch break, I called the EAP hotline.

A caring voice answered the phone and asked me how she could help. I told her what I was thinking. I’d never said out loud that I wanted to end my life and had someone else understand me. It was a relief to know that I wasn’t the only one who thought about suicide. It was a relief that the person on the other end of the phone wasn’t afraid of what I was saying. And it was a relief that she knew how to find help.

She said suicidal thoughts were important to address immediately, and she promised to connect me with a counselor as soon as the next day.

Three days later I met with a licensed clinical social worker. She helped me talk through how I got to where I was and start to understand where I could go from there.

We met 5 times throughout the fall of 2021, and since then my life has changed dramatically. I moved out of the small town where I grew up, found a new home in Indy, found a sense of routine and stability, and I’m learning new ways to regulate the anxiety and unanswered questions that drove me to hopelessness.

I have a long road ahead, and I have many questions still to address on my way back to stability.

But one thing I know for sure is that if my supervisor didn’t care or see my despair, if she didn’t connect me to EAP, and if I’d never called the number she gave me, I wouldn’t be living the life I have today.

I’m 100% sincere when I say EAP saved my life.

Please don’t wait to call (800) 886-9747. Support isn’t as far away as it seems when you feel alone. And EAP is free, confidential, and prepared to help with relationship stress, work stress, financial stress, legal problems, caregiver support, and more.

Call (800) 886-9747 today and find out what help is available to you.

Find out how to get started: www.investinyourhealthindiana.com/employee-assistance-program